There’s a Right Way and a Wrong Way to do Just About Everything

No different than the Secretary of a lodge, I as the state association’s Secretary become the go-to person for the state on an assortment of questions and matters. Many I can assist with but some I cannot. I try very hard to be a reliable resource for our members, yet when it comes to disgruntled lodge members, I become just another frustration for them. More often than not, a member has reached out to me because their letters to the Grand Exalted Ruler or the Chicago headquarters office have gone unanswered. Many even write in their letters to me that they already know theirs to me, too, will go unanswered, and to me that just reinforces their level of frustration and their desperation to get someone to listen to them. And listen is usually the key. Most times they are just looking for someone to listen! In resolving conflict, we are taught that often when a person complains, they are really just looking for someone to listen to them and their dilemma. They may not be looking for you to solve their problem. They are probably just looking for someone to acknowledge the legitimacy of their concern or provide clarity on how better to present it. Listen long enough and they will probably even tell you they aren’t looking for a resolution. Sometimes just letting them get it off their chest is resolution enough! However, for those truly seeking resolve, the aim of this article is to help you avoid frustration in your quest. Read on and you will get some of my suggestions on the right way and the wrong way to get someone to listen!

Many Elks have a military background and know all too well about chain of command. Chain of command is in place for a reason; it is the pathway set to establish authority and responsibility. In the Elks, it is often assumed that everyone knows and understands the Elks chain of command. That is why when a communication is received outside of the chain of command, the receiving party oftentimes just simply ignores it. Think of it like an errant phone call you receive, often at the most inopportune time. If you don’t recognize the number calling or if you are not expecting a call, our nature is to simply reject the call. The Elks system might not be perfect, but understanding and following chain of command will give your concern a much better chance to be heard by someone who can help!

Before I begin, let me give a small disclaimer. It is similar to the one we hear anytime we call a medical professional. “If this is a medical emergency, please hang up and dial 911.” Please understand, the Grand Exalted Ruler, the Grand Secretary, the Chicago headquarters, the State Secretary and the state office are not the Elks’ 911. In fact, there really isn’t one.

Lesson 1 — Starting at the top is the quickest way I know of to NOT get your concern addressed, as explained in the preceding paragraph about chain of command. Avoid this common mistake to avoid frustration. Unlike your elected politician’s office, the more letters received does not help your cause and sometimes serves to diminish it.

Now for some help:

Rule #1 for getting someone to listen — DO NOT send your message anonymously. As interesting as they may be to read, often rendered with no holds barred, they go one place only — to the shredder. Why waste your time and ours? If you are unwilling to make known your identity, we are unable to give it our time!

The Elks Chain of Command (COC) is as follows:

Exalted Ruler

The Exalted Ruler is the top elected official in an Elks lodge. Any and all concerns should first be declared to the Exalted Ruler. Together you can work on deriving a resolution to the problem or on deciding next steps. Even if the Exalted Ruler IS the problem, please first notify them of your concern and give them the opportunity to address it. If they do not or cannot provide a resolution, then and only then should you elevate your concern up the chain. Of course, you should alert the Exalted Ruler that your concern was not resolved to your satisfaction and inform them before going up the chain.

Lodge Advisor

Every Florida lodge has an appointed Lodge Advisor. This is often a Past District Deputy who, more often than not, is a member of the lodge they are advising, and they have a little more experience in the Elks process for problem-solving. The Lodge Advisor’s first question when approached about a problem should be: Have you discussed this with the Exalted Ruler? The Lodge Advisor will work with you and the Exalted Ruler on a resolution to your problem or on deciding next steps. Even if the Lodge Advisor IS the problem or seems to be complicit with the Exalted Ruler, please first notify them of your concern and give them the opportunity to address it. If they do not or cannot provide a resolution, then and only then should you elevate your concern up the chain. Of course, you should alert the Lodge Advisor that your concern was not resolved to your satisfaction and inform them before going up the chain.

District Deputy Grand Exalted Ruler

The state of Florida is divided into 14 districts and every Florida lodge is assigned to one of those 14 districts. The Grand Exalted Ruler cannot be expected to manage all 1,818 lodges in the order, so the GER deputizes an appointee in each district to be their personal representative. The DD is the only person authorized to represent the Grand Lodge’s interests and the DD has resources through the Grand Lodge to assist lodges. The DD’s first question when approached about a problem should be: Have you discussed this with the Lodge Advisor? The DD will work with you, the Lodge Advisor and the Exalted Ruler on a resolution to your problem or on deciding next steps. Even if the DD IS the problem or seems to be complicit with the Lodge Advisor and Exalted Ruler, please first notify them of your concern and give them the opportunity to address it. If they do not or cannot provide a resolution, then and only then should you elevate your concern up the chain. Of course, you should alert the DD that your concern was not resolved to your satisfaction and inform them before going up the chain.

District Leader

Similar to how the GER cannot be expected to manage all 1,818 lodges in the order, the State Sponsor(s) cannot be expected to manage all 90 lodges in Florida. For this reason, the State Sponsors deputize an appointee in every district to be their personal representative. In most districts, this person is a Past State President, though this is not a requirement. The District Leader’s first question when approached about a problem should be: Have you discussed this with the District Deputy? The District Leader will work with you and the DD on a resolution to your problem or on deciding next steps. Even if the District Leader IS the problem, or seems to be complicit with the DD, Lodge Advisor and Exalted Ruler, please first notify them of your concern and give them the opportunity to address it. If they do not or cannot provide a resolution, then and only then should you elevate your concern up the chain. Of course, you should alert the District Leader that your concern was not resolved to your satisfaction and inform them before going up the chain.

State Sponsor(s)

Finally, if your problem remains unresolved, even after going through the proper chain of command, you have one last hope. That hope is the State Sponsor(s). The State Sponsor is a Past Grand Exalted Ruler of the order and serves as the final link in the COC of the order of the Elks. In Florida we have State Co-sponsors: Past GERs Robert Grafton and Mike Smith. Both should be consulted when and if you make it to this step. Of course, the first question I know they will ask is: Have you discussed this with the District Leader? Should there be a need for disciplinary executive orders from the Grand Lodge or the appointment of a Special Representative to a lodge, those would be requested by the State Sponsor and obtained/ordered from/by the GER. This is how it works!

So, what is NOT in the Elks COC? That’s right — nowhere in the chain of command is the State Secretary or Grand Secretary, the state offices or Grand Lodge office, the State President, or even the Grand Exalted Ruler. Yet, this is usually the first persons/ places letters are sent to. Again, signed or not, please don’t waste your or our time with your letters. Follow the time-honored chain of command and at least you will get heard!

This is a journey I hope you never have to take, but should you need it, the process is there for you. Follow it closely, maintain good documentation of your activities and give it time. Most likely your concern developed over time; the resolve may also need some time.

We are an organization of people. Our Elks ways and processes are managed by members and occasionally we get off track. By following the chain of command, your problem or concern will be heard by the people who can help. Though not perfect, it is time-honored and has proven itself over and over. Given the respect it deserves, following the chain of command is the best way to have a problem or concern addressed and resolved.

Share with me your ideas on improving lodge participation! Email me at carl@floridaelks.org. I look forward to hearing from you!